Instructions for Life by The Dalai Lama
1. Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
2. When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.
3. Follow the three R’s:
- Responsibility for all your actions.
4. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
5. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.
6. Don’t let a little dispute injure a great relationship.
7. When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
8. Spend some time alone every day.
9. Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.
10. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
11. Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and
think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time.
12. A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life.
13. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past.
14. Share your knowledge. It is a way to achieve immortality.
15. Be gentle with the earth.
16. Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before.
17. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
18. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
19. If you want others to be happy, practice compassion.
20. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.
12 Things Happy People Do Differently
-- And Why I Started Doing Them
A lot of people have midlife crises. Me, I had a quarter-life crisis a few years ago, when I turned 24. There was no impulse purchase involving a red Mustang or electric guitar, but as my iPhone alarm woke me up bright and early for work one morning in my two-bedroom NYC apartment, I pondered, "Do I have everything -- or nothing at all?"
My gut said that there had to be more to life than the rat race of what I was doing (IT consulting). But I just wasn't sure what it was or who I could turn to for wisdom outside of "the Matrix."
I decided to embark on a journey to find out. I quit my job, minimized my expenses, went to Hawaii and got very serious (in a wild sort of way) about discovering what made me tick. I found out there are a lot of people like me -- young, energetic, intense, purpose-driven, but frustrated with the status quo and a little freaked out about our prospects for the future. I decided to dedicate my life to seeking out the wisdom we need to create extraordinary lives with a deep sense of purpose in a world of immense uncertainty.
Early on, I stumbled across this quote from Dan Millman :
I'd always believed that a life of quality, enjoyment, and wisdom were my human birthright and would be automatically bestowed upon me as time passed. I never suspected that I would have to learn how to live -- that there were specific disciplines and ways of seeing the world I had to master before I could awaken to a simple, happy, uncomplicated life.
That about summed up where I was and what I was discovering. I couldn't just wait for happiness and satisfaction to find me; I was going to have to make my own. So I've been doing that and coaching others on how to do the same ever since.
One of the coolest things I found early on is that studies conducted by positivity psychologist Sonja Lyubomirsky point to 12 things happy people do differently to increase their levels of happiness. Here are a dozen things that any of us -- at any age or stage of life -- can start doing today to feel the effects of more happiness in our lives .
1.Express gratitude. -- When you appreciate what you have, what you have appreciates in value. Kinda cool right? So basically, being grateful for the goodness that is already evident in your life will bring you a deeper sense of happiness. And that's without having to go out and buy anything. It makes sense. We're gonna have a hard time ever being happy if we aren't thankful for what we already have 2.Cultivate optimism. -- Winners have the ability to manufacture their own optimism. No matter what the situation, the successful diva is the chick who will always find a way to put an optimistic spin on it. She knows failure only as an opportunity to grow and learn a new lesson from life. People who think optimistically see the world as a place packed with endless opportunities, especially in trying times. 3.Avoid over-thinking and social comparison. -- Comparing yourself to someone else can be poisonous. If we're somehow "better" than the person that we're comparing ourselves to, it gives us an unhealthy sense of superiority. Our ego inflates -- KABOOM -- our inner Kanye West comes out! If we're "worse" than the person that we're comparing ourselves to, we usually discredit the hard work that we've done and dismiss all the progress that we've made. What I've found is that the majority of the time this type of social comparison doesn't stem from a healthy place. If you feel called to compare yourself to something, compare yourself to an earlier version of yourself. 4.Practice acts of kindness. -- Performing an act of kindness releases serotonin in your brain. (Serotonin is a substance that has TREMENDOUS health benefits, including making us feel more blissful.) Selflessly helping someone is a super powerful way to feel good inside. What's even cooler about this kindness kick is that not only will you feel better, but so will people watching the act of kindness. How extraordinary is that? A side note is that the job of most anti-depressants is to release more serotonin. Move over Pfizer, kindness is kicking ass and taking names. 5.Nurture social relationships. -- The happiest people on the planet are the ones who have deep, meaningful relationships. Did you know studies show that people's mortality rates are DOUBLED when they're lonely? WHOA! There's a warm fuzzy feeling that comes from having an active circle of good friends who you can share your experiences with. We feel connected and a part of something more meaningful than our lonesome existence. 6.Develop strategies for coping. -- How you respond to the "craptastic" moments is what shapes your character. Sometimes crap happens -- it's inevitable. Forrest Gump knows the deal. It can be hard to come up with creative solutions in the moment when manure is making its way up toward the fan. It helps to have healthy strategies for coping pre-rehearsed, on-call, and in your arsenal at your disposal. 7.Learn to forgive. -- Harboring feelings of hatred is horrible for your well-being. You see, your mind doesn't know the difference between past and present emotion. When you "hate" someone, and you're continuously thinking about it, those negative emotions are toxic for your well-being. You put yourself in a state of suckerism (technical term) and it stays with you throughout your day. 8.Increase flow experiences. -- Flow is a state in which it feels like time stands still. It's when you're so focused on what you're doing that you become one with the task. Action and awareness are merged. You're not hungry, sleepy, or emotional. You're just completely engaged in the activity that you're doing. Nothing is distracting you or competing for your focus. 9.Savor life's joys. -- Deep happiness cannot exist without slowing down to enjoy the joy. It's easy in a world of wild stimuli and omnipresent movement to forget to embrace life's enjoyable experiences. When we neglect to appreciate, we rob the moment of its magic. It's the simple things in life that can be the most rewarding if we remember to fully experience them. 10.Commit to your goals. -- Being wholeheartedly dedicated to doing something comes fully-equipped with an ineffable force. Magical things start happening when we commit ourselves to doing whatever it takes to get somewhere. When you're fully committed to doing something, you have no choice but to do that thing. Counter-intuitively, having no option -- where you can't change your mind -- subconsciously makes humans happier because they know part of their purpose. 11.Practice spirituality. -- When we practice spirituality or religion, we recognize that life is bigger than us. We surrender the silly idea that we are the mightiest thing ever. It enables us to connect to the source of all creation and embrace a connectedness with everything that exists. Some of the most accomplished people I know feel that they're here doing work they're "called to do." 12.Take care of your body. -- Taking care of your body is crucial to being the happiest person you can be. If you don't have your physical energy in good shape, then your mental energy (your focus), your emotional energy (your feelings), and your spiritual energy (your purpose) will all be negatively affected . Did you know that studies conducted on people who were clinically depressed showed that consistent exercise raises happiness levels just as much as Zoloft? Not only that, but here's the double whammy... Six months later, the people who participated in exercise were less likely to relapse because they had a higher sense of self-accomplishment and self-worth.
So there you have it. No new flashy car or leather jacket needed -- just simple, scientifically-grounded wisdom for long-term happiness. These are all things you can start implementing today -- with or without a career change -- so I hope you pick one thing and commit to rocking it.
Corrie ten Boom once said, "Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow. It empties today of its strength."
Indeed, numerous studies have shown that worry not only puts a strain on our mental health, but on our physical health, too. Whileworry in and of itself is not bad -- it spurs us into action, after all -- too much of it can lead to anxiety, which can have a lasting impact on health and happiness. For instance, research has shown that anxiety can take a toll on sleep, tax your immune system, raise your risk of post-traumatic stress disorder, and even affect your risk of dying from disease.
The problem with worrying is that it becomes a cycle of self-perpetuating negative thoughts. In a new review, University of Surrey researchers described worry as "a chain of thoughts and images that are affectively negative and relatively uncontrollable."
So what's the best way to stop the cycle? We rounded up some research-backed ways:
Set aside a designated "worry time."
Instead of worrying all day, every day, designate a 30-minute period of time where you can think about your problems. Penn State researchers found in a 2011 study that a four-step stimulus control program could help seriously stressed people take control of their anxieties, LiveScience reported. Step one: Identify the object of worry. Step two: Come up with a time and place to think about said worry. Step three: If you catch yourself worrying at a time other than your designated worry time, you must make a point to think of something else. Step four: Use your "worry time" productively by thinking of solutions to the worries.
Kick your online addiction.
All that time you spend perusing your Facebook news-feed probably isn't doing your mental health any favors. A recent study from Anxiety UK showed that nearly half of people feel "worried or uncomfortable" being away from email or Facebook. "These findings suggest that some may need to re-establish control over the technology they use, rather than being controlled by it,” Anxiety UK CEO Nicky Lidbetter said in a statement. Need some ideas for things to do away from your computer or cell phone? We've got you covered.
The most effective strategies to stop worrying and rumination may be ones based in mindfulness, which involves nonjudgmental awareness of present thoughts and emotions, as well as cognitive behavioral therapy strategies, according to the University of Surrey review of 19 studies. Particularly, the review noted that "treatments in which participants are encouraged to change their thinking style, or to disengage from emotional response to rumination or worry," as well as "treatments which enable participants to adopt more concrete and specific thinking or which cognitively restructure thinking in a more positive and constructive way" seem especially effective.
Accept the worry -- and then move on.
Worrying about worrying is a dangerous cycle to fall into. A 2005 study in the journal Behaviour Research and Therapy showed that people who naturally try to suppress their unwanted thoughts end up being more distressed by said thoughts. Meanwhile, "those who are naturally more accepting of their intrusive thoughts are less obsessional, have lower levels of depression, and are less anxious," the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee researchers wrote. Therefore, people who get caught up in worry when they try to force themselves to stop worrying may want to try a different strategy -- acceptance.
Write your worries down.
Letting all your emotions out on paper before a big exam could help decrease test-taking worry, according to a 2011 study in Science. "It might be counterintuitive, but it's almost as if you empty the fears out of your mind," study researcher Sian Beilock, an associate professor in psychology at the University of Chicago, told U.S. News. "You reassess that situation so that you're not as likely to worry about those situations because you've slain that beast." While exams are no longer a threat to many of us, Beilock noted that the approach could work for people facing anxieties for other things.
Cut yourself some slack.
Dr. Susan M. Love, a professor at the David Geffen School of medicine at the University of California, Los Angeles, told The New York Times that the perceived need to follow all the rules when it comes to health can be a source of stress and worry in itself. Love, who wrote the book "Live a Little! Breaking the Rules Won't Break Your Health" told The Times that at the end of the day, it's impossible to have perfect health, and you're probably a lot healthier than you realize. "Is the goal to live forever?” she said to The Times. “I would contend it’s not. It’s really to live as long as you can with the best quality of life you can. The problem was all of these women I kept meeting who were scared to death if they didn’t eat a cup of blueberries a day they would drop dead.”
Keep your hands busy.
Engaging in activities that keep your hands busy and mind distracted could help prevent flashbacks from traumatic experiences, according to research from the Medical Research Council in England. While the study didn't examine how this strategy impacts everyday worry, the American Association for the Advancement of Science's Bob Hirshon pointed out that "keeping your hands and mind busy interferes with storing and encoding visual images."
Make time for meditation.
Taking some time to find some zen can really help anxiety in your brain -- even brain scans say so. A study published earlier this year in the journal Social Cognitive and Effective Neuroscience showed that meditation training not only lower anxiety levels in people, but it also had effects on the anterior ungulate cortex and ventromedial prefrontal cortex brain regions (the former region controls emotions and thinking, the latter controls worrying).
Get your heart pumping.
Exercise may be a predictable way to beat stress, but it's only predictable because it's so effective. Research in animals, for instance, shows that exercise can affect brain activity of serotonin (a so-called "happy" brain chemical) as well as reduce the effects of oxidative stress, The New York Times reported. And Well and Good points out studies showing that exercise interventions can result in lower anxiety levels than people who stay tied to the couch. “Several studies have found the effects of aerobic exercise to be initially similar to those of medication,” Jeff Dolgan, an exercise physiologist at Canyon Ranch Hotel & Spa in Miami Beach, told Well and Good. “However, in the long term, exercise seems to work better.”
Integrative Medicine News
Orthomolecular Medicine; A scientific modality for Natural Healing
Submitted by: Catherine R. Farrell MS, PhD, ROHP, DAAIM
July 15, 2011
Orthomolecular medicine, as conceptualized by double-Nobel laureate Linus Pauling, aims to restore the optimum environment of the body by correcting imbalances or deficiencies based on individual biochemistry, using substances natural to the body such as vitamins, minerals, amino acids, trace elements and fatty acids. The key concept in orthomolecular medicine is that genetic factors affect not only the physical characteristics of individuals, but also their biochemical makeup. Biochemical pathways of the body have significant genetic variability and diseases such as atherosclerosis, cancer, schizophrenia or depression are associated with specific biochemical abnormalities which are causal or contributing factors of the illness.
Orthomolecular medicine describes the practice of preventing and treating disease by providing the body with optimal amounts of substances which are natural to the body. It seeks to understand the bio-chemical individuality of a person, the current state of their immune system and the natural substances that will enhance and restore the vitality of their body. Traditional testing and symptom assessment can diagnose many of a body’s conditions and protocols developed within both traditional and complimentary medicine can alleviate many of the symptoms. This one-size fits all approach has been the driving force of 20th century medicine. It works well for avoiding the disasters of acute symptoms but often falls short of correcting the underlying conditions. For example, modern drugs can lower blood pressure and avoid cardiac and renal failure but they do not address the slow deterioration of the endothelial cells that keep the blood vessels flexible and help to maintain normal pressure. Orthomolecular medicine through an understanding of the molecular chemistry of the body and advanced state of the art testing can determine on an individual basis what a body is lacking. With this understanding the proper amounts of natural substances such as vitamins, minerals, amino acids, trace elements and fatty acids can be used to help the immune system repair and restore the body to health. In cases where the disease process has caused irreversible damage, orthomolecular medicine can not only be used to halt or slow the progression of disease it can also be used to ameliorate debilitating symptoms without the additional side affects that may be caused by prescription drugs. The science of orthomolecular medicine also addresses toxic conditions that prevent the immune system from functioning and uses the proper doses of natural substances to aid the body in detoxifying and eliminating these harmful substances.
The basics of good health start at the cellular level. Health is cells, tissues, and organs without residual wastes. Health is self-maintaining and self-regulating through appropriate food and drink, balance between movement and rest, restoration through sleeping and waking, regeneration through respiration, evacuation and excretion, proper relationship with nature and the environment, love of self, others and life force intelligence.
We are born to live healthy for a long time but most will die prematurely of disease caused by poor lifestyle habits and toxic accumulations. Toxins interfere with health by preventing the normal bodily functions of assimilation, circulation and elimination. Aging is the premature depletion of matter through corrosion of cell and tissues caused by acidic toxins. We can always improve upon our current level of health and our longevity and our quality of life through: appropriate diet, nutritional supplements, lifestyle modification, exercise, detoxification and drainage.
Registered Orthomolecular Health Practitioner (ROHP) is the designation given by The International Organization of Nutritional Consultants (IONC) to a qualified healthcare professional that specializes in maintaining or restoring biochemistry and physiology in the body for optimum health and well-being. Only practitioners who meet IONC standards may use the designation as a Registered Orthomolecular Health Practitioner (ROHP).
Oftentimes letting go has nothing to do with weakness, and everything to do with strength. We let go and walk away not because we want the universe to realize our worth, but because we finally realize our own worth.
And that’s what this short article is all about – realizing your worth, and harnessing this realization to identify the negative ideas, habits, and people in your life that you need to let go of. Here are some points to consider:
1.The past can steal your present if you let it. – You can spend days, weeks, months, or even years sitting alone in the darkness, over-analyzing a situation from the past, trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could have or should have happened. Or you can just leave the pieces on the floor behind you and walk outside into the sunlight to get some fresh air. 2.Not everyone, and not everything, is meant to stay. – There are things you don’t want to happen, but have to accept, things you don’t want to know, but have to learn, and people you can’t live without but have to let go. Some circumstances and people come into your life just to strengthen you, so you can move on without them. Read The Language of Letting Go . 3.Happiness is not the absence of problems, but the ability to deal with them. – Imagine all the wondrous things your mind might embrace if it weren’t wrapped so tightly around your struggles. Always look at what you have, instead of what you have lost. Because it’s not what the world takes away from you that counts; it’s what you do with what you have left. 4.Sometimes you just need to do your best and surrender the rest. – Don’t be too hard on yourself. There are plenty of people willing to do that for you. Tell yourself, “I am doing the best I can with what I have in this moment. And that is all I can expect of anyone, including me.” Love yourself and be proud of everything that you do, even your mistakes. Because even mistakes mean you’re trying. 5.You are in control of one person, and one person only: yourself. – There is only one way to happiness, and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of your control. Letting go in your relationships doesn't always mean that you don’t care about people anymore; it’s simply realizing that the only person you really have control over is yourself. 6.What’s right for you may be wrong for others, and vice versa. – Think for yourself, and allow others the privilege of doing so too. We all dance to the beat of a different drum. There are few absolute ‘rights’ and ‘wrongs’ in the world. You need to live your life your way – the way that’s right for you. Read The Road Less Traveled. 7.Some people will refuse to accept you for who you are. – Always choose to be true to yourself, even at the risk of incurring ridicule from others, rather than being fake and incurring the pain and confusion of trying to be someone you’re not. When you are comfortable in your skin, not everyone in this world will like you, and that’s okay. You could be the ripest, juiciest apple in the world, and there’s going to be someone out there who hates apples. 8.Relationships can only exist on a steady foundation of truth. – When there is breakdown in a relationship, you must have the hard conversation. It may not be pretty and it may not feel good. But if you are willing to listen and tell the truth, it will open up. When you build relationships based on truth and authenticity, rather than masks, false perfection, and being phony, your relationships will heal, connect, and thrive. 9.The world changes when you change. – Practice really seeing whatever it is you’re looking at. You are today where your thoughts and perceptions have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts and perceptions take you. If you truly want to change your life, you must first change your mind. The world around you changes when you change. 10.You can make decisions, or you can make excuses. – Life is a continuous exercise in creative problem solving. A mistake doesn't become a failure until you refuse to correct it. Thus, most long-term failures are the outcome of people who make excuses instead of decisions. Read The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. 11.It usually takes just a few negative remarks to kill a person’s dream. – Don’t kill people’s dreams with negative words, and don’t put up with those who do. Don’t let people interrupt you and tell you that you can’t do something. If you have a dream that you’re passionate about, you must protect it. When others can’t do something themselves, they’re going to tell you that you can’t do it either; and that’s a lie. These people are simply speaking from within the boundaries of their own limitations. 12.Sometimes walking away is the only way to win. – Never waste your time trying to explain yourself to people who have proven that they are committed to misunderstanding you. In other words, don’t define your intelligence